My progress to date.

Right now I am at a better state than my previous blog entry. Things have gotten weird, I've slowly started to hate the man I've become but at the same time I will use this to work towards my goals.

Sleeping: I don't sleep as much as I should but the quality of sleep has greatly improved. I've worked greatly on trying to lighten most of the burdens in my life.

Fitness: Man. My self loathing behaviors have done wonders for me hitting the gym, All I think about is getting strong and getting what I desire so I push myself harder and harder and make sure to remember that I was shitty now.

Relationship: I'm still married. Its pretty much the same. I've just become acclimated to the situation and made the most out of it. She can fuck who she pleases and so can I. I don't want to fuck these people any more lol. I just kinda lost interest in sexual things with strangers, I had a little bit of fire but now I just want to work on improving me.

Trust: I have confessed more to my friends and have really been open about my oddness. I don't care if I am hated any more. I really don't have much to lose besides people who didn't want me for me. I would rather be alone with myself as a full person than be surrounded by people I only have to fake to be.